background.

this summer God has taught me a lot about ministry and humility. Last week at our VBS closing several people went and told my parents that they should be so proud of me. Sunday the pastor announced that the church would be voting on keeping me on staff through the school year. There were "amens" all around and several people came and told me how excited they were. I got full of myself and began to think about how good I had done this summer instead of giving credit where it's due. to Christ alone.

Wednesday night I prayed this: "Jesus, let these kids love you more than GaGa Ball (their favorite game)". I have no doubt that my kids have had fun this summer but I am so convicted that I have been putting more emphasis on games than the Gospel. Last night a little boy said, "Miss Haley, I'll miss you when you're gone. You're fun and let us play GaGa Ball and all the other adults make us sit still." My heart sank and I can't get those words out my head. I want my kids to have fun. I want them to enjoy church. But I want them to do those things because they are encountering God Almighty, not a children's minister who has just let them play their favorite game.

I've gotten in the way of what God wants to do this summer. I've let it be about me and about fun, instead of about Him. I've had this song on repeat all week. 

God, forgive me for letting games be more important than the Gospel. Take me out of the picture and make it all about YOU! Teach me to play the background. Amen.

Background - Lecrae

I could play the background
I could play the background
Cause I know sometimes I get in the way
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
And I could play the background, background
And you could take the lead

[Verse 1:]
It's evident you run the show, so let me back down
You take the leading role, and I'll play the background
I know I miss my cues, know I forget my lines
I'm sticking to your script, and I'm reading all your signs
I don't need my name in lights, I don't need a starring role
Why gain the whole wide world, If I'm just going lose my soul
And my ways ain't purified, don't live according to Your Word
I can't endure this life without Your wisdom being heard
So word to every dance, a foe, a pop star
'Cause we all play the background, but mine's a rockstar
Yeah, so if you need me I'll be stage right
Praying the whole world will start embracing stage fright
So let me fall back, stop giving my suggestions
'Cause when I follow my obsessions, I end up confessing
That I'm not that impressive, matter of fact
I'm who I are, a trail of stardust leading to the superstar

[Chorus:]
I could play the background
I could play the background
Cause I know sometimes I get in the way
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
And I could play the background, background
And you could take the lead

[Verse 2:]
I had a dream that I was captain of my soul
I was master of my fate, lost control. and then I sank
So I don't want to take the lead, 'cause I'm prone to make mistakes
All the folks who follow me, going end up in the wrong place
So let me just shadow you, let me trace your lines
Matter of fact, just take my pen, here, you create my rhymes
'Cause if I do this by myself, I'm scared that I'll succeed
And no longer trust in you, 'cause I only trust in me
And see, that's how you end up headed to destruction
Paving a road to nowhere, pour your life out for nothing
You pulled my card, I'm bluffing, You know what's in my hand
Me, I'm just going to trust you, You cause the dice to land
I'm in control of nothing, follow you at any cost
Some call it sovereign will, all I know is you the boss
Man, I'm so at ease, I'm so content
I'll play the background, like it's an instrument

[Chorus:]
I could play the background
I could play the background
Cause I know sometimes I get in the way
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?
And I could play the background, background
And you could take the lead