Do we love what God loves?

this morning on our way to church we had K-LOVE playing on the radio. They were talking about the most well known verse in the Bible: John 3:16

For God loved the world so much that He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

God loves the WHOLE world. Every part of it belongs to Him. He loves the people that sat in church this morning and the ones who didn't. He loves the poor, the rich, the needy, the broken, the beautiful. Everything.

What do we love? Who do we love? How do we show that love? Are we willing to sacrifice everything that is precious to us; possibly our lives? 

In Sunday School we always take prayer requests. We usually ask for personal things or request prayer for people that we know which isn't a bad thing. But today someone asked for prayer for Egypt 
They showed love like God does. Love for the world.
In big church we had a guest speaker. He is a church planter from Kansas. He talked about loving the world and giving all we have to Jesus. I'm thankful for this lesson today but I don't want it to just be something that I think is nice or pleasant or good. I want to act out what I learned. I want to love the world, all of it, not just my own little corner. I want to give Jesus all of me, even if it isn't much, because little is much when God is in it.
  

"this one's for YOU."

"this is for you." - that's what I felt like God was saying to me tonight.

I didn't feel good earlier today and kind of debated about whether or not to go to campus ministry tonight. I ended up going and I am so glad I did. I got to see friends which was wonderful but the message was just for me. A student spoke tonight. Someone not much older than I am. He said that God will either tell you to Go or to Wait. He used the biblical example of Abram. 

The Lord had said to Abram, "Leave your native country, your relatives, and your father's family, and go to the land that I will show you. - Genesis 12:1

Abram was told by God to Go. He didn't know where or for how long or what He would be doing. The Bible doesn't say that Abram heard from God then prayed about it for a few months. He dropped everything a left. Going in the direction God led. His obedience seems crazy to me. I don't understand how he just went but I admire it and want it in my own life. When God tells me to go I want to do exactly that. I don't want to be bound by fear or a five year plan or my own dreams or dreams other people may have for me. I would have been fine with just hearing this Go message because that's where my heart has been lately. I want to fulfill the Great Commission. I want to go to the ends of the Earth. But this wasn't the end of the message...


He also shared the story of Jeroboam in 1 Kings 12. Jeroboam had a great opportunity ahead of him but he had to Wait. During his waiting period God used him and shaped him into who he would need to be to become ruler. I don't like waiting. It often feels like waiting is wasting time. Why wait when I need to go? But maybe God needs me to stay for a while. 


The speaker went on to share a personal story of a time when he could have gone but waited and God blessed him. His story was so similar to what I am facing this summer. I have lots of opportunities to Go but I also may have an opportunity to stay and Wait. I don't know what will happen or how God will choose to use me but I pray that I am joyfully obedient to whatever He commands. 


Campus ministry was enough for my heart tonight. I was filled. But then I got a text from a friend who just sends encouragement a few times a week. I always love what she says but tonight was extra special to my heart. this is what she sent...

God always gives us what we need when we really need it. In this case it was a solid friendship from the Lord to King David when he needed one most. 1 Samuel 18:1 - "Jonathan committed himself to David and loved him as much as he loved himself." God isn't just doing this in the Old Testament, He's able to do it in your life right now so be transparent with Him and He will always provide for you in your time of need.

I once again felt like God was saying, "Haley, my daughter, this one's for you."
It blows my mind that the Creator of the universe took the time tonight to speak through people directly to me. He didn't have to do that but He loves me and knew it was what I needed. I am so thankful for His voice tonight and for people who are willing to let God speak through them.  

former pharisee

last weekend I was at a DNOW weekend in Hot Springs. The speaker mentioned the Pharisees and he used this verse to describe them...

Matthew 15:8 - These people honor Me with their lips, but their hearts are far from Me.

I immediately thought of people in my life that have done or are doing this. Several examples came to mind and my heart began to judge. But then God reminded me that this is my story. I am a former Pharisee. And sometimes I still revert back to my old ways. 

You see, my story is that I went to church for 18 years and said all kinds of nice things. My lips were full of praise but my heart was not. I was a pastor's kid. I knew all about the Bible. I witnessed to friends. I tried to be a good example. I read my Bible. I prayed. I led worship. I taught Sunday School and Children's Church. I was on Student Leadership. People looked up to me. But it was all a lie. I knew all about God in my head but I didn't have a relationship with Him in my heart. All of that changed on April 4,2009 when I began my relationship with Jesus. 

I was reminded this weekend just how amazing it is that Jesus gave His life for me and that He gave me a ridiculous amount of chances to love Him. I am so thankful for His grace.

Be careful what you pray for.

I believe that Jesus cares about me. I believe that He wants to hear from me and that I can come to Him about anything. But I also believe that I need to be careful about what I pray for, let me explain...

in the Spring, I prayed for patience. My sweet cousin Loren recently posted a blog where she talked about courage. She said that God doesn't make us brave, but He gives us opportunities to be brave. I believe the same can be said for patience. While I was praying for patience, an opportunity came. I had a friend come to me and ask me how a situation was going and I told her I didn't really know, things were going slowly, and I was still waiting for things to play out.Then she asked me if I had been praying for patience. I was shocked. How did she know? She read my expression of surprise I'm sure and then said, "Here's your chance to be patient. Be careful what you pray for."

This summer my prayer was that God would give me people that were hard to love and that I would love them like He does. I don't really know why I prayed this. I guess I was looking for a challenge. I worked with five other college age students as a summer missionary this summer. I loved me job and the people I got to work with. Our last week of work was a mission trip to Wichita, Kansas. I was excited about this trip and about spending time with my friends...then my Dad (who was also my boss) told me that my younger sister Hannah would be going on the trip as well. She needed to go on a mission trip but I wanted this to be my trip, with my friends, to end my summer. Selfish, I know. I was mad. But then God reminded me of what I had asked Him for. I prayed for this to happen. Hannah is two years younger than I am and probably the hardest person for me to love. She just knows how to get under my skin. But God sent her with us and I'm glad He did. He showed me how to be patient with her and to love her like He does.  

In the last few months, I have been praying that God would break my heart for what breaks His. I didn't really know what this would look like at first. I still don't really know. But He is answering. My heart is breaking and it hurts. I don't know why I thought it would be painless, it is a BROKEN heart after all. God is opening my eyes to things that I have been sheltered from or just ignored in the past. He is shattering my American Dream and showing me His dreams. There is so much more than just what I see in my own little world

You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask for anything in my name, and I will do it!

- John 14:13-14

memories.

I'm trying to read through the Bible this year but I decided to do it in 90 days...I'm already a couple days behind so it may take a little longer. I was kind of dreading the Old Testament but so far God has pointed out stuff that I missed before. So my eyes have been opened rather than closed from boredom as I feared. (How horrible to be bored by the Word of God) Anyways, last night I started in Deuteronomy. My Bible kind of recaps what each book is about and it said Deuteronomy is all about memories. I love memories! I have about 10 journals and three memory boxes. My room is full of pictures. So I got excited about reading this book. It reminds the Israelites of what God brought them through in Egypt. It paints a picture of His faithfulness.

But I said to you, 'Don't be shocked or afraid of them! The Lord your God is going ahead of you. He will fight for you, just as you saw Him do in Egypt. And you saw how the Lord your God cared for you all along the way as you traveled through the wilderness, just as a father cares for his child. Now He has brought you to this place.' But even after all he did, you refused to trust the Lord your God, who goes before you looking for the best places to camp, guiding you with a pillar of fire by night and a pillar of cloud by day. -Deuteronomy 2:29-33

When I look back on my life through memories or pages of my journals I see God's faithfulness. In seasons when I thought my life would be over and God came through. On my very worst days when God was there to carry me through. In the really good times that He allowed me to walk in. God has been all over my life. Why do I think the future will be any different? Why do I doubt His faithfulness when I have so many examples in my own life to look back on? I can relate to the Israelites but I wish I couldn't. There is a song that says, "He was faithful before, He'll be faithful again." It gets stuck in my head a lot...I think God puts it there. 

Wherever God leads me, I shouldn't be surprised or afraid or nervous. He has already been there. He is going ahead of me and is fighting on my behalf. He has done it before and He will do it for the rest of my life. He has cared for me through all my seasons in the wilderness and He will continue to care in more joyful seasons. 

"But even after all he did, you refused to trust the Lord your God"...that hits hard. Even after all He has done in my life. Even after I have seen so much blessing and joy from Him. I find myself not trusting Him. I think I have to handle things on my own or worry until I see results I want. I want to look back on His faithfulness and know that I look forward to His faithfulness as well. I want to trust not just because of the past but because He is God and that is enough.

content.

Yesterday in Lifeway, I picked up a journal with purity on the front cover. It was pretty and so I started flipping through it. One of the pages contained this verse:

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. - 1 Timothy 6:6-8

I have heard this verse before I am sure but I have not been able to get it out of my head since I read it. I spent the whole day yesterday in a mall. There was so much stuff. Unnecessary stuff.  Why do we feel the need to be such excessive consumers? We seem to always need the next best thing. The best technology. The best wardrobe. The best vehicle. The best thing our neighbor has. 

The context I read this verse in was about singleness. I spend a lot of time planning the future in my head. Dreaming up the day my prince will come. Fantasizing about the American Dream. Even yesterday as I was shopping with friends we talked about how we needed to marry rich guys so we could have fancy houses and nice things and buy our kids too many clothes. We looked at engagement rings and talked about marriage. It was fun but why did we spend our whole day in this focus? Why do I spend so much time trying to gain things that I can't keep that I will eventually have to get rid of? 

The only thing I can have forever is Jesus. Why am I not longing for more of Him?

I am convicted by this verse. I have plenty of food and clothing and I need to be content with that. Anything else is bonus. Even the food and clothing are. I don't deserve any of what I have. I am blessed beyond measure. 

Thank you Jesus for Your Word. Thank you for revealing Yourself. Help me to be content. Please remind me that You always have been and always will be more than enough!

new directions.

I have set down to blog quite a few times this past week. I wanted to recap 2010 so I could look back and remember but I either wrote too much or focused a lot on the negative. So I didn't post any of that. 2010 was a year of growth -- day by day. I have spent my whole life in church living from event to camp to retreat to worship service. All of those things brought me closer to Christ. But this past year for the first time my relationship with Jesus grew day by day. I am so thankful for that. 

Summer is my favorite season. For the past 10 years I have spent at least one week of my summer at a church camp --Spring Lake, Beech Springs, Siloam Springs, Super Summer Arkansas, XFUGE, Cold Springs, Journey Camp. I love church camp. I have been on the camper and on the counselor end and both hold such a special place in my heart. Last summer as I worked for a month at Cold Springs I kept thinking that I didn't want to leave that I wanted to be a camp for the rest of my life. My plan was to work at Cold Springs again this summer. That plan kind of fell through because the same job I have had for the past two summers will not be available. My heart broke. I loved spending my summer at camp. But I realized there are other camps so I researched. I "accidently" found a camp that is about 700 miles away from home. It is a camp just for girls and it is Christian-based. When I first found it I was so excited and just wanted to sign up right then. I requested information and received a brochure and a DVD. I was even more excited. It's been a few months since I discovered this camp and my heart is not as excited. Part of me is afraid of sacrifices, afraid of what I will miss out on here, afraid of not being where God wants me to be. Part of me feels so called to go to the ends of the Earth, but I don't see how that is possible this summer. Today I looked up a place that hires summer missionaries in Texas. I have been to this ministry before and enjoyed and I know that God could use me there. 

I have struggled with what to during summer 2011 a lot in the past few months. I felt like summer was the best time for ministry and the best time to make a difference. But here in the past few days, as I have spent time with Jesus and watched Passion sessions I am realizing that because of my emphasis on summer I am missing opportunities now. Summer is still 6 months away. I don't want to waste these next 6 months worrying about where God wants me come summer. I am trusting that He will send me to just the right place whether it is 7 miles away or 700. I will continue to pray about it and ask that if you read this, that you will pray for me too. I don't want to miss any more opportunities.

God is placing desires on my heart to change the world. These desires scare me. They are so different than what I am used to. I am learning that being a Christian is so much more than sitting in a pew on Sunday. It is so much more than just doing church. I don't know what the next steps look like for me. I don't know what tomorrow will bring. I don't know all of God's plan and that scares me. I want to know all the details and be able to plan ahead but I have to learn to trust that God knows and let that be enough. 2011 is a year full of opportunity and I don't want to miss out.

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. - Ephesians 3:20 NKJV